control
I went to the AOG church on Sunday evening with a friend. The pastor was preaching about our influence and what we have control over. So this week I’ve been thinking a lot about that.
What do I have control over? Myself. That’s it. I don’t control anyone else and I if I tried to, that would just be stupid. There is no point in focussing on what we have no control over. If I put my time and energy into what I do have control of then my influence will grow, and I will grow. If that’s what I’m concentrating on and looking to improve, then I can do more, and be more. I will become more of the person that God wants me to be, and that’s what I want.
So then we have to keep control and focus on what we are doing. Our language and the way we think has lots to do with this.
If we say “I have to ….” Then we have no control over what we are doing.
When we say “I will ….” Or “I choose to …” then we have taken the control into our own hands. It’s a choice we have made not something that we have submitted into doing.
Also how we react or respond. Despite what you think, these are not the same thing. When you react to something you are not thinking about what you do. You haven’t chosen your actions, but are merely reacting to the situation. When you think about it and respond, you have taken control and have chosen what you are doing. Often when you think of how you respond, you get a better response and do not regret what has happened later. You can learn also from it.
For example, I have lots of uni work and assignments to do. I can react without thinking and become over-whelmed, stressed and feel like I have no choice in the matter and totally hopeless. Or alternatively, I can choose to respond positively, make a choice to do them, control my feelings and not be a victim. In doing this I then can do them with a more positive outlook, and then I imagine that the finished product will be of better quality.
That’s the easy part. Now I have to put all this into practice.
What do I have control over? Myself. That’s it. I don’t control anyone else and I if I tried to, that would just be stupid. There is no point in focussing on what we have no control over. If I put my time and energy into what I do have control of then my influence will grow, and I will grow. If that’s what I’m concentrating on and looking to improve, then I can do more, and be more. I will become more of the person that God wants me to be, and that’s what I want.
So then we have to keep control and focus on what we are doing. Our language and the way we think has lots to do with this.
If we say “I have to ….” Then we have no control over what we are doing.
When we say “I will ….” Or “I choose to …” then we have taken the control into our own hands. It’s a choice we have made not something that we have submitted into doing.
Also how we react or respond. Despite what you think, these are not the same thing. When you react to something you are not thinking about what you do. You haven’t chosen your actions, but are merely reacting to the situation. When you think about it and respond, you have taken control and have chosen what you are doing. Often when you think of how you respond, you get a better response and do not regret what has happened later. You can learn also from it.
For example, I have lots of uni work and assignments to do. I can react without thinking and become over-whelmed, stressed and feel like I have no choice in the matter and totally hopeless. Or alternatively, I can choose to respond positively, make a choice to do them, control my feelings and not be a victim. In doing this I then can do them with a more positive outlook, and then I imagine that the finished product will be of better quality.
That’s the easy part. Now I have to put all this into practice.
posted by Cara at
11:49 PM
4 Comments:
Good blog, good topic.
I agree, we can't control others, and that we can only control ourselves. We can only influence others.
I also wanted to add that we can, to an extent control how we react to something, without making it a response.
For example, someone close to us dies - we can choose whether we get angry, whether we feel responsible. Yet, we can also respond to it, by choosing how we let it affect us, whether we'll never get over it, or whether we'll learn from it, glean something helpful from it.
Not particularly relevant to your point, but adds another dimension to the situation...I think.
By
switch, at 12:27 AM
good stuff - completely agree about making a decision on our actions!
Its interesting to hear ppl say "oh they make me so mad" (etc) - whereas infact, no-one can make as mad. Its our own decision!
Its the same with forgiveness - its not a feeling, its a decision. But when we put truth in action, then our emotions will follow.
At the end of the day, its taking person responsibility ... a concept our society doesn't like one bit!!!
By
Luke Webb, at 6:06 AM
When i was behind the gate last night the gate it could of made me mad....wait a minute Gates don't make people mad!
I agree too many people are victims to their circumstances...but the choice is ours.
Complaining is the language of victims
By
Trav, at 6:56 PM
Awesome, Cara!
Hey, do you use MSN, I have to tell you stuff! And where did you get to today?
Sammy
By
Anonymous, at 1:05 AM
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